don't hound me bitches

i can't fucking help it if my rant cycles don't align with your goddam schedule... go shove it up your ass... whores

rant-a-palooza

holy fucking christ... you people are fucking idiots... seriously... were you dropped on your heads constantly as children? i fucking told you the deal and you didn't fuckin believe me... the jokes on you now bitches

and you... you whiney bastard... I hope you choke on your own dick after it gets chopped off... you fucking deserve to die like your stupid friend just did... you dick

as for you... you whiney bastard number two... go outside and play hide and go fuck yourself... every single one of your e-skanks are exactly the same... your brain is NOT in your penis you cumstain... quit trying to use it to think with... fuck!

can I vomit on you?

because you really make me sick... truly... have you always been this stupid and pussy-whipped? are you so tragically desperate for a woman to love you that you'd believe anything she's told you, even when people who were SUPPOSED to be your friends have told you what a lying skank she is? fine... accept what the whore tells you... you'll find yourself with no friends left... and when you finally understand we were right, and you're alone... AGAIN... don't fuckin come whining to me... I won't give a flying fuck... you stain

you piss me off

you fucking jerk... nobody asked you to ride my ass on my daily/weekly checklist... it's my goddam checklist there for me to try and keep track of what I'm doing... it's not a list there for you to ask me if I did anything on it... don't keep on fucking askin me if I did anything on my goddam list... if I didn't put a checkmark by it... then OBVIOUSLY I didn't fuckin do it... did I mention it's MY list... asshole

holy ghetto freaks batman!

if it's raining and you let your little yip-yap piece of shit dog outside to go pee... and you let them pee on your front porch... you've stumbled smack-dab into the middle of ghettotastic... I know ghetto... and that's just about as ghetto as you can go... it's lower than ghetto fabulous... it's even lower than ghettorific... holy ghetto freaks batman... it's my new neighbors... who come complete with a bass-thumping ghettomobile... damn

show me the money!

the bidding will start at five thousand dollars... heh

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I'm surrounded by e-idiots

okay you fat e-loser... I must not have made myself clear originally when I told you never to even think about sending me a request to be added to my messenger... I don't fucking like you... I think you're a pathetic example of the male species not to mention a whiney pussy... do I need to smack you in the back of your big dumb head to make this clear to you? don't talk to me you stain... fuck

come again e-loser?

because I'm not quite sure I heard you right... did you just spend five minutes with your head up your ass so that you didn't hear what was being said to you? I think you must have, because otherwise you wouldn't have acted like somebody had shoved a tampon in your ass and now you felt like you were being attacked or threatened... did somebody suck your brain out through your ear with a straw? what the fuck... over

it's called customer service jackass

it's not called customer twenty questions, or customer lets sell you something, just customer SERVICE... say it with me... serrrrrvice... when I call you to tell you that something you gave me is fucked and you need to give me a new one... don't put me on hold to ask your fucking manager if you are authorized to then try and sell me a new one... fuck you... if I had wanted to BUY a new one... I would have taken my goddamn ass to the store and just bought a new one... but ya know... I figured since I was paying you every month for a service you provide, that you might give me a new one without fucking charging me any money... you suck, your family sucks and I'm sure even your nanny who you can afford to pay for, because I'm fucking paying for your service, is currently sucking off your husband while you answer phone calls from people like me... who's the bitch now?

and the nobel prize for domestic engineering goes to...

don't look at me dingdongs... because it sure as hell won't be me... I fucking hate housework... it's like a goddamn cancer... no matter how much I do to battle the creeps that dirty my house... it's almost always dirty... it's not like call the child protective services dirty, but it never seems quite clean enough to my freakazoid mind... why should I give a fuck what you freaks think of how clean my house is? because I fucking do, and I'm such a tard for caring... fuck